All By Myself

As of this moment I am solo parenting until essentially Friday evening. My husband is traveling to Miami today for a tax conference and as a result I will be responsible for all kid related things until his return on Thursday. I’m going to be honest with you guys, I’m not even a touch worried about this.

If this whole process had happened a year ago this post would be a chain of horrible curse

I really don't know why this made me laugh as hard as it did.

I really don’t know why this made me laugh as hard as it did.

words and capital lettered statements about the doom of the universe. I remember when I was about two months pregnant with Kaitlyn (Nate was about 16 months) and Don had to go on a week long business trip to Texas. Nate was all over the place, cranky, and generally difficult and I could barely stand up straight without throwing up. I don’t need to tell you guys that it was a rough week. Now it just doesn’t seem quite that apocalyptic.

I mean yes, I’m not pregnant this time or sick which does help. Also, both of my children are finally at the point where they can be put to bed at a consistent time and mommy can decided she needs to have wine for dinner. I’ve also gotten pretty used to flying solo in the evenings most of the time. I get home from work at 4pm and my husband doesn’t get home until about 6pm. The kids go to bed at 7pm. The bulk of dinner, bath, teeth brushing, vitamins, etc falls to me almost every week day. Doing the bedtime part of the evening solo really isn’t any more difficult than all the rest of the stuff I do.

It’s worth noting that I’m not at all complaining about being the go to evening parent. Don does the morning share by getting them up and ready for the day before our nanny comes around. I also enjoy that my job is flexible enough that it allows me to get home early and hang out with the kids. It’s nice to have some time alone with them each day.

There are some pluses to this whole arrangement too. For one I can pretty much play video games from the time the kids crash until I desperately need to sleep. Usually I wait until 9pm or so to play games, after Don goes up to read for the rest of his evening. I will also have one less person in the house to clean up after which means less dishes!

In reality though I’m going to miss him greatly. He’s my favorite person to talk to and I’m always exceptionally lonely when he’s not home. I also really hate the idea of having to wait to watch American Horror Story until he comes back. I mean damn man don’t you know I don’t have that kind of patience!

How about you guys? How do you hang when it comes to parenting when your spouse is away? If you don’t have kids do you like having time to yourself or just spend the whole time missing the other person? Give me some data points in these here comments.


About Elaine

Mom, engineer, writer, gamer, gym rat. Ain't nobody got time for excuses.
This entry was posted in Don, house bullshit, Kaitlyn, Nathan and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to All By Myself

  1. slignot says:

    I’m happy to share my little data point although I’m increasingly becoming aware that Brian and I don’t have a relationship that matches any conventional norms or stereotypes. We were friends for years before we ever dated and I think in truth we became closer friends and just added another type of intimacy rather than following any conventionally recognizable romantic narrative.

    Brian and I don’t really have alone time as it is and I can’t imagine wanting it. There is no one on this earth I’ve ever enjoyed being with more and my world feels like there’s something missing when he’s not around. Even years ago when we were dating & living apart, if I had to not see him for a week at at time, I thought I was going bananas. On family vacations, I’d make up for a two week absence by sending him mountains of postcards and emailing him at whatever crappy little internet cafe we could find.

    He was going to be on a work trip (that was cancelled due to the federal shutdown) and I remember wondering what the hell I was going to do without him. When it’s rescheduled I’ll probably spend lots of time being sad and lonely while cuddling dogs.

  2. Justin Last says:

    My spurts of solo parent time are much shorter than yours, but I find that I like the change in routine that comes with “Mommy isn’t here tonight.” I don’t have every thing my wife does memorized so while trains might not usually come out after dinner we still have a good time. I will say, though, that I hugely miss having a second set of eyes while I’m cooking dinner. I don’t rightly know how my wife makes lunch every day and watched the kids at the same time while still appearing sane when I get home from work. I like to cook (and do most of our dinners), but if it weren’t for my wife watching the kids while I do it everything would be burnt. Forever.

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