I drank the terrible Vodka last night. It was not the wisest decision I ever made on a Monday night but it happened. I’m not going to sit here and lie to you guys, America has absolutely nothing to be proud about when it comes to that shit. The inside of my head is currently attempting to break free of the prison that is my skull. I’m attempting to fight back the hoard with massive amounts of coffee and Advil but this is not proving successful. Naturally I deemed this a perfect time to construct this post.
I’m going to go ahead and blame video games for my poor decision to drink on a Monday. Borderlands 2 has now sunk its poisonous fangs deep into me and won’t let go. I played coop last night for the first time and that was all it took to get me completely hooked all over again. I started playing around 8pm and proceeded to stay online until 11pm with the company of two friends and bad Vodka. Actually, bad is not the appropriate descriptor for that. Evil? Horrendous? Soul breaking? Makes me wish for the zombies to come and end it all? I mean look, I’m not going to waste it because I don’t believe in that but understand that my husband will be hearing of this until that bottle is gone.
Games like Borderlands always seem to get their hooks deep in me for extended periods of time. Part of it has to do with the Diablo style loot drops that keep every encounter interesting. The rest of it is the social aspect. I’ve never enjoyed playing video games competitively. I just can’t invest enough hours in a single game to make it worth my while, nor do I really desire to. Cooperative games are a completely different animal. There’s something relaxing about jumping in and playing for a few hours with friends. It always devolves into silliness and ridiculous jokes and after the days I’ve been having lately that is exactly the type of therapy I need.
I find when I’m frustrated with one aspect of my life I need outlets that fill out the other parts to keep me distracted or I kind of unravel. I end up miserable if my focus is on the negative things going on. Judo has served as a welcome distraction largely because I have to concentrate on what I am doing in that moment or someone will end up hurt. It also is a lovely form of stress relief. Those little, stupid stress balls have nothing on throwing someone.
Games form a completely different type of distraction. Instead of spinning me up and forcing me to exhaust myself, games wind me down slowly. I can sink into a game and let some of the stress and frustration ease away slowly. This is especially effective when I can play with other people because it forces perspective on whatever bullshit has me feeling frustrated. I get to laugh and smile with friends. I get the same feeling when I have ridiculous, silly conversations with my husband. Just the act of laughing makes things feel lighter, less dense. I think this might be a clue that I need to laugh more overall.
Unfortunately no amount of laugher (or coffee or Advil) seems to be assisting in beating back the wrath of the bad Vodka hangover. I am considering dressing up as that Vodka bottle for Halloween. Scariest shit I have experienced in years.