I’ve been sitting here staring at a blank post window for 15 minutes. It’s not that I don’t have things to write about, I do. The stumbling block for me is exactly what it is I feel I need to say. Unfortunately I didn’t find the answer to that question before I started writing so now you get to see me incoherent ramble towards…..something.
Yesterday one of the women who works in my son’s room at daycare starting to harp on me because my son doesn’t hold his own bottle. She’s older than me and either through experience or her desire for life to be a little easier in the room she strongly believes he should be able to sit at a table, hold his bottle, and drink it. I’m not going to lie to you, I think this concept is bullshit. First, the motor skills required to lift and hold a bottle with no handles, tip it, and then drink from it are a little beyond that of a 11 month old. A sippy cup is one thing because it’s short, balanced for tipping, and you know….HAS SOME GODDAMN HANDLES!
My real issue here is that I personally don’t really care if my son holds his bottle and if I’m truly honest I would prefer he didn’t. My favorite time of my whole day is the moment after he’s out of the bath and in fresh pajamas and I get to snuggle him in the glider and give him the last bottle of the day. He’s not in a rush to go anywhere and he lives to snuggle close to me and clutch his lovie while he drinks those few ounces. I live for this moment. I can kiss his forehead and sing to him. I can smell that baby smell that is rapidly evolving into something different, something more like a little boy. I won’t get this back and I’m not in a rush for him to grow up. I don’t want him to hold that bottle.
Beyond a selfish desire to hold my son for as many months as possible there is the issue that honestly holding a bottle is a bullshit idea of a developmental necessity. He holds a sippy fine even if he hasn’t quite figured out how to drink from it without spilling it everywhere. It’s silly to think he needs to do this. Who cares? I personally don’t give a shit if he holds it or not. The issue here is that this woman feels it needs to happen and is pushing hard to make it so. She harps in a way that makes me second guess myself as a mother and I.hate.that.shit. I worry that they will push this on him and he won’t drink because of it. I worry if I make an issue of this it will become a huge issue that could affect his care.
This is silliness and it’s absurd that I’m concerned over this. I hate feeling like I’ve done something wrong because my kid isn’t doing things the same way as the others in the class. I hate this kind of stuff in the same way I hate the judgmental looks that competitive mothers give me because my son isn’t walking yet (back off bitch he’s not even 12 months old). I hate that all of this has to be one big competition or one mold that all children should conform to. Shouldn’t we be passed this bullshit by now?